Not Approved
Well, yesterday we got the news. Our dossier was sent back from Colombia and they want some additional items from us so we are not approved at this time. They have two items that they want us to address before they will consider us.
The first item they want is a more detailed explanation of our motivation to adopt. Our agency finds this request abnormal and feels, as we do, that this was outlined clearly in our home study. So we are sending a letter to the ICBF basically repeating ourselves on why we want to adopt a child.
The second item is that they don't want to approve us for a 0-12 month old infant. They want to approve us for a 0-2 (which is really 0-2 and 12 month - so basically 0-3) child. They did not state why, and our agency isn't sure as well. Colombia has always matched the youngest children with the youngest adoptive parents and since we are not yet 30 (you have to be at least 25 to adopt from Colombia) we aren't sure why we are getting this restriction.
Needless to say we are upset about the news. It makes me nervous that they are asking for information we have already provided and they seem to be telling us that we won't get a young baby. I can't help but have a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I made myself wait until this morning to write this post but I still don't think I'm ready to delve into my feelings about this right now. I do still hope that we get approved but any confidence I had on that happening is gone. I'm just not sure what will happen next - I feel a lot of uncertainty and sadness right now.
posted by Stacy @ 7:00 AM
8 Comments:
Don't lose hope. So much has seemed to change in the process with ICBF over the last year, and unfortunately that is the nature of adoption. In the end, you will be matched with the child that you are meant to have--your child. And that is THE most important thing. It is a long, drawn out process, but I am told it is all worth it in the end!
Andrea
Charlotte, NC
Oh kids, I am so sorry you are having to go thru this turmoil. I can't imagine what their problem is. But if your agency thinks you can work thru this then please don't lose hope. I will continue to pray for this to be settled and everything to work out okay. Though we all want this to be much sooner than later, I will keep waiting patiently for a new grandchild.
Love from your little one's grandma
I am sorry to hear of your discouragement. Just keep the faith that God is preparing you for something very special and is working his master plan, even when we can't see it. He will guide you, he will lead you. You are in our prayers. Beth Hollis
You can work through this. I know of a couple of Colombian families that have been having issues with one particular new person in the ICBF adoptions office and have been very frustrated by the requests to things they thought they had answered. I want to say that he left the agency but I can't be sure. Perhaps your case is being handled by that person or someone new to the job.
We also were hoping for a 0-12 month referral and got a 12-35 month approval. Ended up our son was about 10 1/2 months at the time of our referral (11 months exactly the day we got the news)and just over a year when we finally got him...the delay being on our end. I know of another family that was approved for 0-12 month and got a referral for a 2 year old because they felt it was better to for her to be closer in age to her older brother. ICBF does a very good job in matching the children and families and are diligent in their responsibilities. They want to see happy families.
Hang in there. Get the questions answered quickly. Get your agency to ask why. And I would also write a letter to be included in your dossier explaining why you would like a younger child. At least you are approved for the age range you want. We didn't even get that...but still got the age child we really wanted. So it will work out in the end. I promise.
I'm really sorry that you have to hurt like this. Although it's easier said than done...keep your head up. Ultimately, you WILL receive and be blessed with YOUR child. You guys have wonderful support with your family and blog stalkers...We'll walk with ya... Hang in there...God knows what he's doing (even though at times it may not seem like it!)... and before you know it, you WILL have YOUR baby!!! We all love you...
Thanks for the comments everyone
I just popped over because I have a friend adopting from columbia, we are adopting from Vietnam, but in the world of adoptions, it is all uncertainties, and unfortunately we have to comply to what the officials wants, just know, that God has the most perfect child waiting for you and He will not let you down. Keep your faith in Him and He will reward your faithfullness. Best wishes, and it will be worth it!
I am sorry to hear this, but I have faith that it will work out for you!
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